Damn Red Sox

I don't know who this kid is but the picture pretty much says it all. The Yankee's swept us........I don't know why I didn't expect it- after all it is the end of the summer. You Bastards

I love this

Young sexy Trent - young sexy Richard Patrick (later of Filter and now of Army of Anyone) and a strangely normal looking Marliyn Manson with a lip ring. I had to watch this a couple of times to make sure it was him. Ok who am I kidding - I watched it to look at Trent. The man is sex on a stick.

Things I should be embarrassed by.....but am not

There are a lot of things about me that don't seem to fit. I think my friend Maria put it best when she called me a "psychotic enigma." Um thanks I think. So I started to think about this and here is a short list of things about me that I probably should be embarrassed by but am not.

1. I am a huge NASCAR fan. My dad's a mechanic and he only has daughters so I grew up watching hockey and car racing and still love both. Not that open wheel pansy stuff though, real stock car racing. People say the same thing to me all the time. How can you watch cars going around and around for hours. My initial reaction is always the same - you don't understand the sport (yes it is a sport). It's all about the pit stops, how the car is running and the communication between driver - pit crew - pit boss and spotter. There's a lot going on out there when you are running inches from someone at 180 MPH. And just in case you were wondering my favorite driver is Jr. That's Dale Ernhardt Jr for those of you not in the "know". The fact of the matter is I will plan my weekend around a race and it's very rare that I miss one. I will however be missing Saturday night's race in California because it's labor day weekend and I'm going away to relax. I'll probably find a way to check it though.

2. I'm a Buffy the Vampire Slayer geek. I love it and I was super sad when it went off the air. Now I get my fix with the 7-8am showing on FX and fan fiction. You gotta love that James Marsters all punked out as Spike the vampire. Sexy as all get out.

3. Given the chance I would drop everything and be a Nine Inch Nails groupie. Well maybe not a groupie more of a hanger on - on the tour. I just want to talk to Trent Reznor and get a glimpse into that mind. Now that REALLY is sexy as hell.

4. I read www.Perezhilton.com a couple of times a day. That guy gets all the dirt and it's freakin hysterical. It's a good break in the middle of my day. And no, I don't believe everything that I hear or read.

5. I think I may be addicted to iTunes.....it's getting scary.

6. I like Country music - I can also blame this on my dad. I don't like it all but I do like guys like Steve Earle, Shooter Jennings, Johnny Cash etc. That Dierks Bentley (or Jerks Bentley as my dad calls him) is pretty damn cute too.

7. I am HR Manager who doesn't really like people that much. This isn't a surprise to those of you who know me.

8. If Trent Reznor isn't available I'll take Dave Grohl or Josh Homme.

9. Guys in suits are ok but jeans and workboots are really it for me - in you own a 67-69 Chevelle then you are soooo all set. If you also play the bass guitar I may have to marry you on the spot.

10. I spent the year between my 21st-22nd birthday either drunk or in bed depressed it was a weird time for me. I look back at it as a character building learning experience. I still struggle with depression but thank God for Wellbutrin. I heard Trent Reznor say it best once. He had a doctor tell him that he was just a quart low in the happiness dept. I love that.

Ok I think thats enough about me for right now......... I should be doing school work but I needed to do something to engage my brain.

RIP

Hilly Krystal the icon who brought us CBGB's died yesterday at 75 after a battle with lung cancer. Please take a moment to remember the man who was brillilant enough to start the careers of Sonic Youth, Talking Heads, The Ramones, Television, Blondie and many many more.

Thank you Hilly from the bottom of my music loving heart.

It should be mentioned

Today is the anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. A day where we had front row seats to our President's ineptitude. People's homes still haven't been rebuilt, people's lives were forever shattered and FEMA still isn't doing a goddamn thing. What a joke.

Driving

I live in Massachusetts and I drive everyday to Rhode Island to work. I have to say on a daily basis I seem amazing assholeness (if that's not a word it should be)on the highway. Today I took a long lunch to go to the bank and to the acupuncturist. As I get on the highway I notice in my rear view mirror an ambulance with it's lights on. I turn down the radio and notice that they don't have the sirens on - whatever- I was always taught you got the hell out of the way of any vehicle with flashing lights ~ red - blue or green ~ it doesn't matter - you just move.

So at the same time that I notice this a guy passes me on the left (same lane as the ambulance) hand barely touching the wheel, scrunched way down in his seat and on his phone. You know the type "let me impress you with my car and my $500 suit, because my penis is small and I'm short, oh and I have $100,000 in credit card debt from trying to make up from my perceived shortcomings". We've all met those guys -I hate those guys and lets just say there are an inordinate number per capita in this state.

Anyway this guy doesn't move. The ambulance gets right up on his ass and he still doesn't move. He hasn't even looked in his rear view mirror or anything. He is so engrossed in his phone call that I'm surprised he remembered he was driving. What a jack ass. Finally either the ambulance blew the siren or his 900# phone call ended regardless he finally looked up and he got out of the way.

On the way home I started to think - "why do they even install mirrors anymore, apparently no one uses them." I've never driven anywhere were people just put on the blinker and go as much as they do here in RI. They don't even glance in any of the mirrors - what the hell is that all about?

And lastly, do they not teach people what the different lanes are for on the highway? I was always under the impression that the very right hand lane was for getting on and off the highway and for people who drive impossibly slow. So what is with all of these people using this lane for their own personal jet way? People are trying to get on and off the highway asshole..........that really pisses me off.

There is so much more about driving that I could rant about but I seriously have to get back to work if I want to take a vacation day tomorrow!

Bathroom crime

Ok so I guess the real question is - Is what Larry Craig did actually a crime? After watching some heated discussions on another board I follow and reading a blog from a lawyer in Atlanta I'm beginning to think......no, not really. Sex in a public bathroom can be disgusting because it's so dirty, disturbing to other people using the bathroom and of course uncomfortable because of limited room - but is it really illegal? Maybe not so much.

The biggest problem I have with this whole situation is that if he is gay he is doing everything within his power to deny it. That to me is sad - this man looks to be in is 60's and that means he's lived a lie his entire life. Very sad. The other issue is the holier than though attitude of these guys (and ladies) who go on and on about something and then get caught doing something equally as disturbing (think Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly).

He should never have pleaded guilty - that so far has been his biggest mistake. But all this call for ethics investigation etc etc. Please - stop wasting our tax money and just let it go.

No gay Republicans?

Yeah right. Maybe if these guys could keep it in their pants we'd believe that. The latest Republican to get caught is from Idaho and was in a bathroom allegedly soliciting the guy next to him for a good old fashioned blow job. The senator is of course denying everything because after all he's a married man - and we all know that if you are married you couldn't possibly be gay. Right? Yeah, right. This is a guy who has voted against just about everything possible to give gay and lesbians any sort of legal rights:

* Voted YES on constitutional ban of same-sex marriage. (Jun 2006)
* Voted NO on adding sexual orientation to definition of hate crimes. (Jun 2002)
* Voted NO on expanding hate crimes to include sexual orientation. (Jun 2000)
* Voted YES on prohibiting same-sex marriage. (Sep 1996)
* Voted NO on prohibiting job discrimination by sexual orientation. (Sep 1 1996)

Did he think if he voted against it all, it would go away? What is WRONG with this people? They may as well just hand the Democrats the keys to the castle and be done with it.

Here is what most people don't get. There are a lot of us out here who could give two shits about who you sleep with. Here is what I care about: are they of legal consenting age? Yes? Well good. Are there any farm animals involved? No? Even better. Is the relationship consensual? Yes, well then excellent. Have at it.

I can't wait until this "old guard" or "old boys network" are out of office. Funny I thought I would have to wait for them to leave office by retiring. Looks like that may not be the case. Here's hoping the next generation can do a better job.

One more thing

I couldn't let the day go by without mentioned that yet ANOTHER Bush crony has finally resigned. How many does this make? Three? Four? That FEMA guy - Rumsfeld - Rove - and now Gonzales. I wonder what it's like to watch the empire you thought was bullet proof crumble around you? I wish I could feel sorry for the guy - wait a minute let me check.....nope no sympathy here.

The depths of human depravity

Humans never cease to amaze me. I just wish that they amazed me more in a good way. The other night when I probably should have been doing homework I was surfing the news channel just checking to see what was going on in the world when I came across a story that is so heinous that I had to calm down before I could write about it. While I was surfing somewhere up in the 40's (the news channels) I stopped long enough to read a headline that went something like "Attendants attack disabled patient". I'm sure that wasn't the complete headline. I remember thinking to myself "Oh, I can't watch this", and I changed the channel.

As some of you know I do respite/PCA care for two disabled brothers. They are 14 and 16 and the sweetest kids (well most of the time- they are teenage boys after all) that you could ever hope to come into contact with. Something like the above news story is my absolute biggest nightmare. These kids are defenseless - their mom and I talk about it all the time. They depend on other people completely for their safety - and once again people have proven that they cannot be depended on.

Finally after taking a few deep breaths I went back to the channel that had this story. It turns out it was a nursing home type of situation and there was a woman who was completely disabled who was turning up with all kinds of strange bruises. So the director of the home put a hidden camera in her room. What she found was that two of the attendants (CNA's or PCA's I'm not sure) were beating this woman AND robbing her at night. They would repeatedly hit her and slap her and then if she made any noise they would hit her again - mostly in the head. Now here is where it gets even worse. The director saw this was going on and instead of stopping it immediately she left the camera in the room for a week or so to make sure they had enough evidence. WHAT? One incident wasn't enough? What is wrong with this woman? She should lose her job immediately and go to jail for aiding the assault. I'm not sure what happened to her but I know that they arrested the two people (a man and a woman) who were doing the actual physical assaulting of the woman.

I'm at a complete loss. I just don't understand it at all. What happens to a person or what goes on in a persons brain that makes this OK for them? I wish scientifically they could map out that thought process to see how those synapses fire and to see if there is anyway to change it.


Sometimes it just as unscientific as this: people suck.

Where is the art?

I've noticed that my last few posts have had nothing to do with art. When you are an artist you go through super creative periods (or as my teacher Kim likes to call them "prolific") or extremely dry spells. In keeping with my general temperament it's pretty much all or nothing with me. I'm either working steadily and creating tons of stuff (some good - some bad) or my stuff is packed away and hasn't been touched in weeks. Saddly that is the case right now. I'm in my last week of school for the semester. My project on Theories of Personality is due next Friday by midnight. I have a pretty good handle on the project it is just between that and work it leaves me completely creatively depleted. I have noticed that this always in the last month of the semester so I'm not worried that I"ll never paint again - I just wish I could find a balance to be able to do all three things simultaneously and have none of them suffer.

I probably should be freaking out a little more because I have a show at the Foxboro Library in January. Which means having everything done before Christmas because that week in between Christmas and New Years is often kind of a "lost week" for me. A lot of my work is smallish now so I need to create kind of a lot to take up the space. I probably need at least 120 pieces if I continue to work within the same size. Right now I have about 30 - 35 pieces (as you can see in the watercolor rack to the left) - so it's time to get my ass in gear.

Crap just seeing those numbers in front of me realize that it's time to get a move on. I do however have some oils that I'm going to rework and hopefully I'll have time to create a few new ones. I haven't worked in oil in so long it feels like a bit of a foreign medium to me. I have one huge oil that hangs in my living room that I will bring to the show and hopefully sell, it's pretty big and will take up one whole panel. You can't tell from the photo but the piece is about 5 1/2 feet long by 4 feet high. Sorry about the glare, it's because of the copper paint.

I have two weeks off in between the semester ending on Friday August 31st and starting up again on Sunday September 16th. Instead of rushing around and trying to do a million things I should just sit back and relax - go to my art class that I have been missing and just get the creative side of my brain engaged again.

OK now I am going for a walk and then I have to pick up my mom from the airport and then get down to some personality theory.

Excellent magnets and I'm not that crazy

So while I was trolling Ebay the other night looking for cool NIN stuff(always dangerous) and I came across these super cool magnets. By the way the coolest NIN thing that I found was a NIN onsie which I gave to my friend Kim's new baby Lucy. Kim hates music and I'm determined that Lucy will not inherit that trait! As soon as the onsie fits her (it's a 6 month onsie) I will post a picture of the little rocker.

These are going to look fabulous on my fridge.

I know I've mentioned my obsession with Trent a few times but I have to say that this takes the cake. I feel much better - really.

iTunes backup #2

15 discs. That's how many it took to back up my purchased songs. Seems like a lot of time and money spent to make sure I don't lose "The Night The Lights Went Out in Georgia" or "Jackie Blue" or better yet anything by the Thompson Twins.

Ok maybe it was worth it.

iTunes backup

So I thought I would be an adult (I hate that) and back up my iTune purchases. I have about 1900 songs on iTunes and over 200 of them are songs that I have purchased. When my work lap top went down I lost a bunch of purchased songs because I kept hitting the no button whenever it asked me if I wanted to back up. So tonight after purchasing two Happy Mondays songs and 1 LCD Soundsystem song I thought it would be a good idea. Let me tell you there is nothing that pisses me off more then when I purchase a song and I get that message that says "you've already purchased this are you sure you want to do it again?" They might as well as finish the sentence with YOU DUMBASS you should have backed up.

So I'm backing up and I'm on disc #12 - I really wanted to go to bed early tonight but who knows now. This is what happens when I try to be responsible. It takes too freakin long.

Horoscopes

I get my horoscope delivered every day to my work email. I love reading it and thinking about the different ways that it could be true or that it could come true. Are horoscopes real? It's not my place to say. Can people tell the future and speak to the dead? Yes I think they can but thats just me...

Dear Jennifer,
Here is your horoscope
for Wednesday, August 22:

Try not to worry too much about whether or not you're in the right place -- you should be able to feel the love coming from all around you. Now is a great time to reflect on the people that make your life what it is.


There it is your basic "don't worry, be happy" horoscope. Works for me today.

More Great Stuff

Back when MTV was really a music channel and not just a place for the reality whores to call home they used to have a show called 120 minutes. Of course this show was on in the middle of the night on Friday/Saturday night because it played "alternative" music. Alternative to what? The shit they were playing during the day? I guess so.

Anyway - after digging around on youtube here is some of the stuff that is so very missed from that time......

Elastica - another great band lost to drugs in the 90's.




David Bowie looking damn good in his eye makeup and Trent just looking scary which of course I love...



Holy crap it's the Throwing Muses - remember them from Boston? This video shows a really really young Tanya Donnelly in really bad 80's garb.



Ok one more...Sonic Youth 100%. I always had a major thing for Thurston Moore (the singer) and his wife Kim is the baddest chick bass player out there. If you look close the skater in the hat in the black and white shots is Jason Lee long before he was famous. He's also the one who ends up dead for some reason.



Ok kids - that's your music lesson for today.

Now This Is Good Music

Now this is what I mean........


Creative - fun and best of all TALENTED. Huh, imagine that.

Or this



You didn't think I post about music without Trent now did ya?

Let's go back a little further. One of the most underated bands ever - Jellyfish-.



So sad they aren't around anymore.

And then finally- my favorite musician of all time



Not the best video - but who made good videos in the 80's? It's kind of ironic that the videos were bad during the time when video channels actually played them.

Radio

My God - when did radio get so bad. Before I go any further let me freely admit that I am a complete music snob. I listen to radio so little that when I do I'm left with this awful taste in my mouth. Even these stations that claim to be "alternative" are just ridiculous. (Yes I am convinced I could do a better job myself)

Listen up people My Chemical Romance and Fall Out Boy are NOT alternative music - in fact I'm not even sure if they are music at all - but if we have to label them I would call them pop music played by boys in makeup. Now I have nothing against boys in makeup mind you but these guys wear it for all the wrong reasons. The right reason would be because it truly is a form of self expression - the wrong reason is because everyone is doing it and you think it looks cool (thats you guy from Fall Out Boy).

Weekdays between noon and 1:30 there is a station in Providence that plays what they consider to be a "retro" lunch. I personally think something has to be at least 10-15 years old to be considered retro (in the music world) but these guys think anything that has fallen off their playlist in the last three years counts. I bet if you asked them who Concrete Blonde was or what the name of U2's first and second album were (Boy/October) they would have no clue. Eeeessshhh get a grip.

Now Julie Kramer on 101.7 WFNX out of Boston knows her stuff. Every weekeday at noon she plays what is called the "Leftover Lunch". It is specifically music from the late 70's - 80's and early 90's. It kicks ass and I love it. Unfortunately I live pretty far outside Boston so I can only get it if I'm driving on 128 which is pretty rare since I work during the day like the rest of the world. I was however on 128 today on my way to meet with my professor and I got to listen to it and it rocked.

So the point here is good stuff doesn't get played on the radio - they'll play one cut off of a really good record (usually the worst song) and then it goes away. Then we are stuck with crap like James Blunt or Artic Monkeys. Come on radio people pull your head out of your asses and play the good stuff. I know it exists.

I'm not even lying....

I took this cool little book quiz and it turns out I am one of my favorite books.
Pretty cool huh? Take the quiz.

You're To Kill a Mockingbird!

by Harper Lee

Perceived as a revolutionary and groundbreaking person, you have
changed the minds of many people. While questioning the authority around you, you've
also taken a significant amount of flack. But you've had the admirable guts to
persevere. There's a weird guy in the neighborhood using dubious means to protect you,
but you're pretty sure it's worth it in the end. In the end, it remains unclear to you
whether finches and mockingbirds get along in real life.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Not the warm fuzzys

Because of my research I get a lot of emails from the Dept. of Defense and other military arena's. One of the places that I get an update is www.military.com. Today one of the headlines was "Army Meets July Recruiting Goal". Why doesn't this make me feel all warm and fuzzy? They are offering something like a $20,000 signing bonus or maybe that should be called a $20,000 bribe.

As I mentioned I get a lot of different emails from the Dept. of Defense, I went onto the website and just signed up for some things not really sure about what they were. Now I get an email every time a casualty is identified. It's a little disconcerting. I think that everyone should get these it really makes what is happening over in the Middle East real. You see the name - age - where they are from and how they died.

This is not an anti- war post. It's more of an anti-death post.

Fight Club

How many people out there saw the movie "Fight Club" with Edward Norton and Brad Pitt? I bet if we took a poll the numbers would fall heavily to the side of men seeing it. I know that I had purposely never rented it because really, who wants to see a bunch of men beating each other bloody? Well in a conversation with my friend Kate she asked me if I had ever seen it and when I said no she immediately made plans to dump her kids at her moms and have me over for dinner so we could watch the movie.

I'm not going to give anything away I just want to encourage everyone who hasn't see the movie to do so. I want to be clear though...this is not for kids - not even close. Edward Norton and Brad Pitt are really at the top of their game here and if you can get past the violence and see it for what it really is - a reflection of society you can really begin to get into the psychology of the movie. There is a bit of fist fighting but the truly bloody scenes are few and far between. I'm not a huge Brad Pitt fan but let me tell you that Tyler Durden is now officially one of my favorite movie characters.

When the all of the pieces start falling together in this movie it throws you for a huge loop. It's the kind of thing that you just sit and look at the screen with your mouth open. Immediately you think I have to see this again and again and again because now that you know the secret other things will make even more sense.

See the movie - close your eyes during the bloody scenes if you have to but see the movie.

Still Obsessed

Yes I'm still obsessed with Trent Reznor. I thought it would be over by now but it doesn't seem to want to go away. (Or maybe I don't want it to go away.........). Anyway, they are back on tour in Russia and are updating the site every few hours with new pictures so now I have another site to obsessively refresh. Eeessshhh just what I needed.